Monday, May 14, 2007

cough cough, gag gag, oh what a relief it is

Besides going for a mid-day beer with my fellow student pals and spending at least two days staring at the wall, I have another post-finals tradition: getting sick. Ever since my first year of college, as soon as the last exam book is closed, I fall victim to post-stress disease disorder, or PSDD. Ok, technically I made up this disorder. But after 6 years of studying it, I am nearly an expert in its mysterious ways.

First, I should be reeeeeally stressed out for a good bit of time. One week ok, two weeks better. It must be finals or exam-induced stress, weddings and work will not cut it. (If you are suffering from non finals-related PSDD, get a massage and call me in the morning). Then, after being incredibly stressed out for two weeks or so, knowing that you absolutely CANNOT get sick or you will fail an entire semester of classes, you should relax with glee, because you are finished! FINISHED! HooRay! And then you shall get sick.

My family and I have a few of theories as to why this happens. The first is that stress will eventually make you physically ill, and it usually takes, oh, two weeks for that to happen, conveniently about the time you are finished being stressed. The second is that I was going to get sick anyway, as finals usually happen around the time of intense seasonal change, but my body is able to hold it off because I CANNOT get sick and the mind is a powerful thing. (that's my favorite, probably because it involves me being able to hold sickness at bay with my mind). Finally, there is a theory that this is all psychosomatic, and that I'm not really sick, my body just expects to feel sick because my mind tells it that I'm finished with finals and it always gets sick when I finish with finals.

Happily, this year has been very minor (knocks on... the coffee table). Only a mild cough and sore throat, one day of chills and some headaches. Nothing I can't party around. Stick it in your ear, PSDD.

1 comment:

flip said...

I'm glad your finals are finally over, for now. I like the "beer cures almost everything approach." Add chips if additional healing is required. As a true beliver in "Better living through chemistry" I rely on a special blend of Advil and Aleive to make the pains of age retreat for a time. I just hope my stomach holds up under the onslought of NSAIDS. As for stress relief... throw up and feel better in the morning.