Wednesday, May 21, 2008

WHY do I need this product?

We are living in a material world, and I am a material girl. Especially when it comes to accessories and hair products. Show me a model with beautiful hair, and I'll show you $7.99 for that conditioner.

So I appreciate good marketing and clever commercials. They are trying to sell me something, and I will play along because, ultimately, I want to buy it. But I have no patience for stupid commercials. Because of your dumb presentation, I will not buy your product out of spite. Or I will snidely comment, "Well, SOME marketing director just lost his job" as your spot fades from my TV.

All that being said, I will not be buying Lysol Deep Reach Toilet Bowl Cleaner. Have you seen its commercial? It has all the standard Lysol bits about how it kills 99% of germs, but instead of focusing on surface germs that could kill your entire family by mere eye-contact, the Deep Reach talks about the germs that lurk deep in your toilet, past the point where you could ever reach with a brush. Deep Reach kills these germs, even as far back as the s-bend.

Cool.

But my problem is, if you cannot reach these germs, even with a brush, then why the #$*^@ do you need to kill them?! Little Tommy cannot reach his hand back to the s-bend. So who cares whether there are germs back there? There are germs under your floorboards, too. Rip up the floors! Disinfect them! No, you cannot possibly be infected by them, but if they're there they must be destroyed! Introducing Lysol UnderFloor Extreme Cleaner! Cleans where even your contractor could not reach! Look for Lysol Behind-the-Drywall Cleaner, coming this summer!

Come on, people. I'm like shooting fish in the barrel. But before I'll help you make a buck off of me, your commercial is going to have to make sense.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm with ya, girl! The commercial bugging me is the one where they show different women in the bathroom- smiling while washing hands, smiling while checking make-up, smiling while touching up hair. I'm thinking, "what are they all smiling about? new aerosol cleaner? new freshener? new lighting, for heaven's sake??? No! It's new deep clean TOILET TISSUE!!!! (Not for the toilet-like your complaint-for the WOMEN!)What is this world coming to? (And is it at Wal-Mart?) Diverged's Mom

db said...

And why are we so anti-germ anyway? Germs are natural. Kids are getting really sick- not because of germs at school, but because there are fewer for them to become immune to while there! Roll in the germs, I say! Let the germs be! You'll be sick less often that way, I think.
And I am TOTALLY with you on the s-bend germs. What can they possibly do to you?

Quirky said...

Well, you can't have those peeping s-bend germs looking at you while you're on the can, now can you? That's just embarrassing! And an invasion of privacy. Kill the peeping germs!

Assuming S-bend germs have eyes, that is.

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